1st Day of Kindergarten

I was watching her play outside; joyfully, without a care in the world, giggling her heart out when it first happened. Sadness began to creep slowly across my heart and a heavy sinking feeling starting to make its way to my stomach.  I have felt this pain before, but it caught me off guard this time. I thought I was prepared for this, and by round three this was going to be a breeze.

 You see, I’ve already sent two other children off to kindergarten for their first day of school, and while it was hard, I quickly found great joy in watching their love for making friends and learning that I realized everything was as it should be.

So why is this pain and hurt creeping through my spirit again? Maybe it’s because I have been a mother to a preschooler for the last decade; having a precious babe by my side for more hours than I can count (my little side-kicks, as I like to call them). Maybe, it’s because she is my last and I am grieving the goodbye to ten joyful and precious years of being a stay-at-home MOP.  Maybe, my heart is just so full of gratitude that my God would grant me three beautiful gifts to nurture, love, and mother—that my heart and (eyes) can’t hold back the love that spills out.

Yes, they are tears of love; tears of thankfulness, joy, sweet memories, and God’s grace.

I can’t promise the tears won’t continue to fall out. I will do everything in my power to hide them on the first day of school from my most excited little kindergartner.  I wouldn’t dare want to dim her light. But, if you see me linger for one last look and discreetly wipe a tear from my eye, (or have a complete melt down in my car) when I say good bye- know that my tears are full of love and joy. Tears of sheer gratitude that an all loving, grace-giving God would grant me such precious treasures to love, hold, and cherish.

“Thank you Lord Jesus for these precious little ones you entrusted in my care. They are yours, not mine, and I will trust them in your watch care all the days of their lives.  I thank you for the change of seasons, and stages of life. I will choose gratitude over sadness. I will find joy in each new season of my children’s life and praise you for the little people you are creating them to be. I will rejoice as they grow and walk in your ways. Lord you are so good and your love endures forever. . . .Thank you for the tears. They are reminders of great love.”

~Katy Roberts

8-6-16

Heavy Burden

Three nights in a row the Lord has awoken me with the desire to pray deeply for a friend. She is a friend that is going through a nightmare. At least, what I consider to be a nightmare. She seemingly has very few to confide in and the weight of what she is going through is very heavy. I awake and I pray. I pray for peace and comfort and perseverance. I pray for God’s deliverance and rescue. I yearn for my prayers to be answered swiftly. I ache to help carry her load.

Through my prayers for my friend, the Lord has continuously reminded me of Moses. Do you remember the story of the Israelites being attacked by the Amalekites? Moses gave instructions for Joshua to pick a group for battle. Moses then went to the top of a hill overlooking the battle with the staff of God in his hand and he raised it high. If you read in Exodus 17, you will find that as long as Moses held the staff high the Israelites were winning the battle, but as soon as he lowered his staff the Amalekites began to have victory.

My friend is in a battle. A battle of trust, faith, and complete dependence on the Lord. She is powerless and defeated without perseverance in faith, trust, and the sovereignty of our great God.

But sometimes, she gets tired. Her fears and doubts make her faith weak and that’s when brothers and sisters in Christ step forward. You see Moses grew weary. His arms became weak, but Aaron and Hur stepped in to help support his arms. When Moses wanted to faint they held him up. When he grew tired and weary, every fiber of his being screaming to give up, his friends supported him. They helped Moses hold his banner of complete trust and dependence in the Lord high.

“But Moses' hands were heavy. Then they took a stone and put it under him, and he sat on it; and Aaron and Hur supported his hands, one on one side and one on the other. Thus his hands were steady until the sun set.” Exodus 17:12

Are you carrying a heavy load today? Are you losing sight of what a powerful God we serve? Has fear weakened your trust and faith? It’s okay if you have grown weary and tired. Just like Moses had Aaron and Hur, the body of Christ is made to support you, encourage you, stand by you, and lift you up. 

If you will pray a prayer for my friend. You don’t know her, but she needs some Aaron & Hurs in her life right now. Pray for God’s deliverance. Pray for the enemy to not have a single foothold to stand on and for truth to win.

Thank you so much sweet friends. We are the body of Christ. We are his hands and feet. Every prayer matters. Thank you for helping me and my friend carry this load.

Have you heard?

It’s going to happen.

At some point in our lives, even if we try to avoid it, we will hear gossip.  As believers in Christ Jesus, when gossip inevitably hits our ears I believe we have a responsibility to respond with action. 

True or false, we are now privy to secret knowledge about someone else’s life. 

Let’s challenge ourselves to keep the following three responses in mind.

*First, step in their shoes. True or false, we put on glasses of grace, mercy, empathy, and love.  We try to determine what they might be going through. What could be the possible cause, weakness, or struggle that led them astray?

 *Secondly, before taking one more step we start praying. If we listened to the gossip, we are now held responsible.  Secretly start battling in prayer for the persons involved. Take it as a direct assignment from the Lord. Pray over the situation, the people involved, the possible struggles, and for God to intervene, heal, and convict.

 *Thirdly, stay silent. Loud in prayer, quiet in voice. We should tell no one what we heard. As though our life depended upon it, let's hold ourselves accountable before God to not continue the cycle of gossip.  

***(Obviously, if this gossip contains any illegal reports or form of abuse you would report to authorities.)

“Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent.” Proverbs 11:12

The Month of No Electronics

A couple of months ago, my husband and I made the decision to take away our children’s electronic devices. 

Each child had a kindle fire, and while we originally thought it would be useful for educational games it had morphed into a prison for their minds. They came home, did homework, then headed straight for their electronic game. 

If you asked them a question they answered without looking up. If you needed their attention it took a whole 10 seconds for them to exit their electronic world before entering into reality to be able to formulate a coherent and appropriate response. They became moody, easily angered, and eerily quiet.

We knew something had to change.

We were watching this electronic device steal their childhood right before our very eyes.

My husband and I sat them down and explained why we were making the decision to take away their electronics, cold turkey, I might add. They grumbled and complained, but we stuck to our decision. We started by saying, “let’s give it one month and we will re-evaluate.”

They asked for a couple of days if they could have their electronic before they finally accepted our decision. And then, something absolutely wonderful began to happen. They pulled out old board games and played together. They went out doors and created games. They started riding their bikes and building ramps. They dug for worms, gave them a bath (which killed the worms) and then gave it a funeral. They jumped on the trampoline and planted seeds. THEY BEGAN TO LIVE AGAIN.

It's now been three months and I recently commented on how much I have enjoyed watching them play and live life together since getting rid of the kindles. My daughter responded, “Oh yea! I forgot we had kindles” THEY HAVE NOT EVEN MISSED THEM!

I’m not saying they will never pick up an electronic. I simply write this to encourage any of you who have considered being the “mean parent” and taking away the electronics or seriously cutting back. I write this to encourage you. I write this because sometimes it’s nice to know someone has your back. Sometimes it’s nice to not be alone.  And sometimes it’s just nice to stand together as parents.  

One Brick

This quote below explains my heart’s desire for today and every post, I share. Each post is personal to me, and I try my best to “re-express truths” that God is teaching me.

“Strive to re-express a truth of God to yourself clearly and understandably, and God will use that same explanation when you share it with someone else. But you must be willing to go through God’s winepress where the grapes are crushed. You must struggle, experiment, and rehearse your words to express God’s truth clearly. Then the time will come when that very expression will become God’s wine of strength to someone else. But if you are not diligent and say, “I’m not going to study and struggle to express this truth in my own words; I’ll just borrow my words from someone else,” then the words will be of no value to you or to others. Try to state to yourself what you believe to be the absolute truth of God, and you will be allowing God the opportunity to pass it on through you to someone else.” My Utmost for His Highest.

I heard a story of some people visiting a military school, and they noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand. They asked a senior student walking by, “What are they doing?”  The senior replied, “Each year the upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish this courtyard.” The people asked, “So what is the answer?” The senior replied with a smile, “One.”

As I think on that little story I am reminded of myself. Too often I try on my own strength and knowledge to solve all of life’s problems. I get on my hands and knees, exerting all kinds of energy to uncover the solution, when if I just stepped back and sought wisdom from above the Lord promises to help me, lead me, and guide me.

The Lord has recently done just that for me. I became aware of some major struggles in my life that were holding me back spiritually and causing anxiety. I was simply blinded by my own vain attempts to do things my way that I failed to see the root of my struggles.

What was the root of my struggles, my anxieties, and my problems? One simple brick.

The fear of the Lord. A foundational truth that is paramount for believers in Christ- to fear the Lord.

I have struggled for years trying to lay this brick of truth. I first struggled in my childhood with how could I fear a God that I loved so much. I grew to understand that fear meant respect and moved on from there thinking I had that brick fully laid. I deduced that I loved my earthly Father, I respected my earthly Father, and as a child I feared my earthly Father when I disobeyed which led me to obedience. So, the same is with my Heavenly Father. I am supposed to have love, respect, and fear for my God because it is for my good. It pushes me on towards obedience. It keeps me from death.

To fear the Lord is of utmost importance. And while I understood the verse I didn’t fully live it out. This put a crack in my foundation that has led me to the sin of pride which has branched off into emotional insecurity,  the need for people’s approval and their validation, in turn making them my god. I unknowingly feared man more than god. Such a dangerous and exhausting way to live.

When we fear man more than god, when we serve the creature instead of the Creator we are walking with one foot in the door spiritually speaking and one foot out. We are lukewarm.  We are full of fear, nerves, and anxiety. We may attempt to live boldly for Jesus, but if we can’t proclaim that to someone when the rubber meets the road for fear of humanly rejection then we are letting people be our god.

This happens daily for most of us. We are commanded in Romans 1:17 that the righteous are to live by faith. When we live un-righteously we are suppressing the truth to the world around us. You see the righteousness of God is revealed to the unbelieving world by your faith! Romans 1:17 says “the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith.” Does that make sense? Your obedience, your faith, reveals FAITH to others. It reveals salvation that comes through Christ.

Romans is very clear in 1:21-24 “For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal men. Therefore, God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves.”

They exchanged the truth about God for a lie. They worshiped and served the creature rather than the creator. Romans 1:25 paraphrased.

Romans then gives a list of sins that are happening all around us. And while you and I may not be participating in this list of sins are you giving your approval to those who are? Look at Romans 1:32 “Though they knew God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.”

We are ambassadors of Christ (2 Cor. 5:20) Yes! We are called to LOVE one another (Romans 13:8) but in your LOVE check yourself. Are you loving them on towards death? Or are you loving them on towards LIFE everlasting? When you approve or don’t say anything for fear of being labeled “judgmental” you are bowing to the creature instead of the creator. And sometimes that creature or false god is what others think of you and sometimes that creature or false god is yourself. We need to ask ourselves the question, “Who is my God? Who do I live for? Who am I most concerned about pleasing?”

Is the word of God saying we need to arrogantly, rudely and obnoxiously start proclaiming people’s sins to them? No! We are to listen to the voice of our God, go where he leads, speak his truth with love and courage, all the while praying for courage to not fall into the sin of desiring man’s approval over Gods approval.

If you take it a step deeper we are truly acting more for our own good than our neighbors. We don’t say anything or stay silent on a subject because we selfishly don’t want to be rejected. That is loving ourselves more than our neighbors. We say we are loving them and accepting them, but that is often not the case. We are scared people pleasers who fear rejection from man, hurting our image, over God.

Here is the deal and hopefully the closing;

All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.  We are only justified by his grace through the gift of Jesus Christs death on the cross. Through redemption, through our Savior we are made new. We are not perfect, but we should never abuse his kindness and grace.

Personally, here is my scripture prayer to help me say goodbye to insecurity and hello to fearing God.

I want to take “You shall have no other gods before me” seriously.

“He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. (Psalm 40:2) “Whoever walks in integrity walks securely. (Proverbs 10:9) Behold my servant, whom I uphold, my chosen, in whom my soul delights; I have put my Spirit upon him; (Isaiah 42:1) “I am hidden with Christ in God” (Colossians 3:3) “I am never alone. God is always with me.” (Psalm 9:10) I am the Lord; I have called you in righteousness; I will take you by the hand and keep you;” (Isaiah 42:6) “Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored and I love you!” (Isaiah 43:4) “You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord, and my servants whom I have chosen.” (Isaiah 43:10) “I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind.” (2Timothy 1:7 “Cast off the works of darkness, put on the Armor of Light.” (Romans 3:12) “We make our aim to please him” (1 Corinthians 5:6-9) “O Lord, be gracious to us; we wait for you. Be our arm every morning, our salvation in time of trouble.” (Isaiah 33:2) “He will be the stability of your times, abundance of salvation, wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is Zion’s treasure.” (Isaiah 33:6)

Lord, as I live for you each day, as I parent in your name, as I walk this world as your child, I pray that I will seek to only serve you. I pray that I will not seek anyone’s approval other than yours. I will fail and make mistakes, but help me to only care what you think and to give myself grace and room to grow.  I pray you help me to not seek validation for my strengths, weaknesses, or decisions from anyone but you God. You know me inside and out. You created me in my mother’s womb, you know my every desire.  Let my every decision be based on your word. Amen.

Below is a free printable card of the verses above. 

Seasons Come and Go

I always feel a bit anxious when my children are about to enter into a new stage of life. I begin to feel nervous about the future and the whole “letting go” part. I start to reminisce on the joy of the present stage and dread the arrival of the next--- until God intervenes and brings unspeakable joy.

This recently happened between my youngest and I. My youngest, my baby, is headed off to Kindergarten in a few short months. To be honest, I have wanted to keep her little.  I have so enjoyed her Pre-K years that the thought of leaving them behind leaves me teary eyed and sad.

I felt this way with my first two children as well, and until recently forgot what a beautiful life lesson I learned about letting go and moving on to the next season of life.

When God moves our children and ourselves from one season to the next, there is always something just as beautiful about the next season that we would miss if we stayed in our present state.

Let me explain. I have adored having my baby at home. I have enjoyed the toddler and pre-k years. And then recently, like someone flipping a switch, she has started to make connections. All the things we have been teaching her are starting to come together and bring delight and joy to her heart and ours. This would not happen and we would not experience this joy if the seasons never changed. 

For example, she is learning to read. All the letter sounds, and vowel sounds, are beginning to make connections and she is ECSTATIC. To watch her read a word and figure out what it spells gives her the biggest smile. She loves it! And I do too!

And then spiritually speaking, we have taught her about the bible, and Jesus, and God’s word since she was born. I have whispered Jesus loves you more times than I can count into her ear. I have prayed and spoken scripture into her life since she was born. But all of a sudden, the connections are coming together in the most beautiful and precious moments.

She recently asked if God could hear and see everything. I said yes He can. She paused and then said out loud, “God? {brief pause} Hello?” And then looked at me and said, “He didn’t answer?” I explained about prayer and how God doesn’t always speak verbally out loud like Mommy or Daddy, but if you say something to him with a heart of prayer and listen carefully inside your heart he will speak to you.   She thought for a minute, and then very seriously, looked to the side and said, “God, I love you.”  She was very still and silent for a moment, looking down with deep concentration, and then she raised her face with excitement and deep joy and said, “MOMMA! I heard him! He said He loves me too!!!”

These tender moments remind me of the joy of letting our children grow. I am reminded of the saying, “Let Go, and Let God”. It can be tough at times on a Mothers heart to let go, but God always comes through for me too. He NEVER changes. He gives me sweet moments that remind me I truly would never want to hold my kids back. I would never want to keep them from moving on to the next season. Because with the change of seasons comes new life and fresh fruit.

Thank you Lord for being so good to us. Thank you for helping us through each season of life. Thank you for the outpouring of your Spirit and love. Thank you for redeeming us and giving us new life through the cross.  You are my greatest source of joy and I love you.

Praying God's Word

When my words cannot formulate my hearts cry and prayer, 

the scriptures never fail. 

Praying God's word into my life this morning. 

For seeking guidance, instruction, direction…

For the waiting and hoping heart….

For encouragement….

My Scripture Prayer from the Psalms

Your face Lord, do I seek. Hide not your face from me.  27:9

Teach me your way, O Lord, and lead me on a level path.  27:11

Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord  27:14

The Lord is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped. 28:7

Be {my} Shepherd and carry {me} forever. 28:9

O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever!” 30:12

You are my rock and my fortress; and for Your names sake you lead me and guide me. 31:3

I trust in you, O Lord; I say, “You are my God.” My times are in your hand. 31:14

Oh, how abundant is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you and worked for those who take refuge in you, in the sight of the children of mankind. 31:19

Blessed be the Lord, for he has wondrously shown his steadfast love to me. 31:21

Love the Lord, all you his saints. 31:23

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. 32:8

Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield; For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you. 33:20-22

In Jesus Name, Amen.