My Pastors Wife

Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be the Pastors wife? Are you a Pastors wife?  Are you in the early years of ministry, middle years, or later years?

I understand what it is like to be the wife of someone in the ministry. My husband has fulfilled the calling as a children’s minister, youth minister, and associate pastor. He is currently the Minister of Education, and has been for the past seven and half years. Altogether, we have served in the ministry full time for a little over eleven years.

From my limited years of experience, compared to others, I want to offer those of you supporting, serving, and fulfilling your call alongside your husband in ministry some encouragement.

First of all, GOD sees you. And for those incredible women in my own church (Nancy, Lea, Alysce, and Hannah) this is for you. I see and notice you. Not everyone sees what you do, because they have never walked in your shoes. I see the many hours you spend supporting your husband and trying your best to serve and help him in his ministry.  I see the many events you end up hosting,sometimes in your house, and the way you help plan, lead, help set up, and administrate behind the scenes (or in the late hours of the night after all else has settled).  I see you taking initiative to love, welcome, and offer encouragement to those around you.

I see the younger ones trying to balance serving their husband, while working hard as they finish their education strong. I see the late nights you spend trying to balance it all. I see some of you working so hard in an outside job because let’s be honest, ministry is not about the money. You give all day, you give at home, you give to your husband, you give to your kids, you give to your church. God sees that too.

I see and know that you do all of this because you are equally called by God to fulfill this role.  I also know very well that you don’t need recognition or appreciation, but I love you and want to do it anyway.

I see your kind gentle spirit. My pastor’s wife, Nancy, is such a testimony to this. There is a prayer by Mother Teresa that I think sums her spirit up.

“Let me preach You without preaching, not by words, but by my example, by the catching force, the sympathetic influence of what I do, the evident fullness of the Love my heart bears to you. Amen” ~ Mother Teresa

I would be willing to guess that many of you could say the same about your pastor’s wife.

I also see you sitting alone, or corralling kids by yourself. I see you sometimes overwhelmed and a tear slip discreetly from your cheek. I see the loneliness that can sometimes come with leadership and I so badly want to pull you in. I see your heart and I see you pulled in many directions. I also see the hurt when your husband is hurt or criticized. You are human and you take it personal. If only our skin were created thicker.

But really, what I see in you, more than all of that I see joy. I see your joy in watching lives transformed. I see your joy when you have the honor and privilege to pray for the people in your ministry. I see the joy when you have given your all and know that God did big things in hearts and lives.

I hope and pray my sweet sisters, my fellow pastors wives, that you will know how loved you are and that you are not alone. Thank you for accepting this call from God. Thank you for serving and praying for your husband and church. Thank for sharing him and being on call all the time. You encourage me and bless me and I love you.